People From Around The World Share Dumb Stunts That Almost Ruined Their Relationships
Couples go through a lot before getting to the altar, and some don't make it at all. Staying in a relationship means seeing past each other's faults and putting a silver lining on hard times; but we're not here to give out relationship advice. We're here to revel in the embarrassing, dumb things people did that nearly ended their love affairs before they began. Luckily, the couples in these stories managed to work it out, but only after their silly stunts practically exiled them to singlehood forever.
43. He didn't ghost her after all.
My uncle didn't call his now-wife for over a year after they first met and he got her number. He kept the paper she wrote it on and ended up finding it and calling her asking if she still remembered him and was still interested in going on a date.
Photo by rawpixel.com from Pexels
42. Those boots were not made for walking.
While on a date with my now-wife, I insisted that everything in San Francisco was walking distance from everything else, and decided we should walk from Pier 39 to Golden Gate Park. It IS walkable, but not third-date walkable, or whatever-shoes-she-happened-to-be-wearing-that-day walkable. There were tears. We're still together.
41. At least his breath was fresh.
For our second date I had invited her out with myself and some friends to celebrate a friend getting a job. I drank. Heavily. She was my designated driver. She drove me home and as she pulled up to the curb I threw open the door, rolled out of the car, and vomited into the gutter. She then offered to help me cross the street, to which I responded by yelling, "I'M DISGUSTING!" and sprinting across the street. Once inside, I brushed my teeth aggressively. She asked what I was doing and I told her I needed to clean my mouth so I could kiss her. After I was done, I walked to my room, laid down, and immediately fell asleep. She spent the night to make sure I was okay.
I'm now holding our baby girl who was born just last week. I asked her at one point why she stayed with me through that and she said it was because even though I was wasted, the whole time I was still gentle and kind, asked her if she was having fun, and introduced her to everyone I knew. I'm a lucky guy.
40. Pull over.
We drank a lot on our second date, Ubered home. Next day went back to get his car, and it wasn't there. He was so devastated. He just bought it recently and it was stolen. We filed a police report. Took forever and just generally sucked. We walked to his friend's house nearby, and there was his car, perfectly un-stolen. He drank so much he forgot he moved it before our date. Now, once in a while when we're trying to find our car in the grocery store parking lot or wherever, one of us will say "It's stolen. Call the police."
39. She was a perfect ten.
I flicked a dime at her head. We were playing table football. Not sure what I was thinking. She has a scar. I kiss it every night before we go to bed. We are married and have three kids.
38. He kneeled, he cried, he conquered.
When I kneeled to propose I landed on a sharp rock and we had to go to the ER because it lodged in my kneecap. My wife's favorite detail about this story: because of the kneecap situation, I forgot to actually ask. She thought I got nervous and froze up and decided to save me by just saying yes. She also stopped me from pulling the rock out of my kneecap with my trusty leatherman which turned out to be the correct decision. She was a little bummed that I wasn’t simply choked with emotion, but the situation as a whole is (now) a very fond memory.
Pixabay
37. So gallant.
She was about to sneeze and she was sitting half on my lap so I kinda thought she was gonna sneeze on me and I don't know what I was thinking but I put my hand up to block her sneeze except I had a glass in my hand and I blocked her own hand from covering her sneeze and instead she slammed her face into my glass.
Married 6 years now. She still has all her teeth.
36. Hit me with your best shot.
I once spear-tackled my then-girlfriend out of misplaced enthusiasm in high school. I was excited to see her and handled it as badly as was possible. It was in front of a bunch of our friends and I ended up knocking the wind out of her and making her cry. That was about 17 years ago, and we're still together.
I also licked my plate at a fancy restaurant because the salad dressing was so good. She still brings that one up every few years.
Pixabay
35. He's slowly paying her back.
On our first dinner date, my husband ordered a ton of food to show me his favorites at an Indian restaurant - and forgot his wallet at home, and only discovered doing so when the check had arrived.
Cleared me out well over a hundred bucks and he was absolutely mortified, but we've been married for near two years so I guess it worked out.
Photo by bruce mars from Pexels
34. He hit her in the feels.
I was sitting on the couch as we were playing Wii bowling. She was standing behind the couch, lovingly holding me. I draw back the Wii mote and WHAM! I wack her in the face with the Wii mote at full strength. Her mom was also in the room.
33. We both go down together - not.
We were taking a shower together and she was soaping up while I was under the hot water rinsing off and she slipped and instead of grabbing/helping her I pulled away, thinking for some reason that I’d already rinsed off and didn’t want to get soapy. Thank god she caught herself on the shower curtain and didn’t get hurt. She was, uh, not happy. My explanation of my faulty thinking didn’t help at all, either. We laugh about it now but it took some serious smoothing over at the time.
Pixabay
32. And from then on, she cooked.
I made myself a burger for dinner before heading over to her place to hang out. Unfortunately I'm not the best cook and left a little too much pink in that burger. While we were at her house I bet her I could fit through the doggy door and crawled right through. Then she immediately closed it behind me and we raced to the front door, she won and she locked it. Now at this exact moment my bowels decided they had enough of that burger from earlier and I felt my stomach cramp. Luckily I held it all in and ran back to the back door with my cheeks clenched and starting knocking desperately in the door. She was laughing at first but when she saw my face go suddenly serious and I said very calmly "I need you to open the door.... Now please." She unlocked the door and asked if I was okay, I told her to stay downstairs and turn the TV up loud. She agreed but was very confused. So I ran upstairs and then had one of the most violent bowel movements of my whole life. I thought the worst was behind me until I went to wipe.... And of course no TP. So she took my instructions really well and when I yelled to her, texted her, and called her I got no answer. After probably like 10 missed calls she finally answered and I asked her to bring me some TP and leave outside the door and try not to breathe on the way upstairs. She was great about it and immediately started making fun of me when I came back downstairs. Now quite a few years later a couple kids and cat, she's still making fun of me.
31. Ahem, I love you.
When we were dating, my husband and I were holding hands when he had to cough. Instead of letting go of my hand and covering his mouth, he continued to hold on, brought it up to his mouth and coughed into my hand.
It was a dry cough. If it was anything more I would have run.
Photo by Ajay Donga from Pexels
30. This couple is in it to win it.
We were making out in her dorm, I was on top and I had an accident in my pants.
We had come back from class, her dorm was right next to the school so we walked over. Started as studying and then turned into kissing. Once we were horizontal, I felt a shift in my guts. I took a chance; most of my gas that day had been dry and silent so it felt safe. As soon as I let it go, I knew I was in trouble. As I stood up, she repulsively sniffed the air. She asked if I let one rip. I simply said I pooped myself and needed a ride home. We went to the movies as planned afterwards.
Pretty sure that's when I fell in love.
Photo by Artem Beliaikin @belart84 from Pexels
29. Bonding over B.O.
I know what my husband would say, because I still tease him to this day.
We had been dating for two weeks and were spooning on his futon, watching a movie. Out of nowhere he says, "I'm really sorry, I can't hold it in anymore." And rips a HUGE fart.
My husband was a very clean, tight knit, prudish kind of guy, so I couldn't help but let out the biggest laugh while he turned about as red as his beard.
Image by StockSnap from Pixabay
28. When does he sleep?
The night I met my husband, he stared at me while I was sleeping. For 4 hours straight. It's been 3 years. He still stares at me until I scold him for it. Then he waits until he thinks I won't notice and starts staring again.
I love him to the moon and back, even though he'd probably stare at me the entire trip.
27. First date hickey.
First date with my wife. End of the night I went to kiss her on the cheek trying to be all sweet.
She thought I was leaning in for a hug and leaned in too. As she leaned in I turned my head and instead of her cheek I kissed her neck. Turned super red and embarrassed then goodbye and almost pushed her out of the door at my apartment. I immediately texted her sorry as well and she laughed.
Three years into marriage she apparently didn’t care.
26. Bat your lashes at him.
Wife here, but about three weeks into dating, my husband invited me to a house party at his best friend's place. We were playing beer pong having fun. The other team is up, they toss the ball, I lean forward to try to block it, my now husband extends his hand out in front of me at the same time, catching the ball but at the same time hitting me in the eye and some how pulling out 3/4 of my eyelashes. He felt terrible about it and tried to burn off his eyelashes in sympathy. He hates when I bring it up but I think it is the funniest story!
25. Make it mean something.
On my first date with my wife, we got to talking about tattoos. I have a rule that if I have an idea for a tattoo, I sit on it for a while to see if I really would still want it. I mentioned this to her and explained how glad I am that I do this because otherwise I'd be covered in Tool (the band) tattoos or some "other stupid stuff". She rolled up her sleeve to show me that she had the lyrics to one of their songs tattooed across her arm.
For the record, I don't really hate Tool. I just used to be super into them in high school and have since grown out of them. I still put them on once in a while, and she forgave me.
Pixabay
24. She should have left him.
It wasn't until after we were married that my wife told me that I almost didn't get a second date because I talked waaaaaaaaaaaay too much during the movie. I don't really remember it but apparently I was leaning over every 30 seconds or so to tell her what I was thinking. Also, "Valkyrie" with Tom Cruise probably wasn't that great of a date movie, but it all worked out in the end.
Pixabay
23. I love you, Brenda - no, Sylvia - no...
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