Don't Embarrass Yourself & Follow These 20 Fine Dining Rules
How Many of These Rules Do You Follow?
Going to a fine restaurant is a pleasurable extravagance that we spoil ourselves with and should be treated as such. However, that doesn’t mean there aren’t still expectations of the diners themselves. Some etiquette rules are archaic and arbitrary, but others really are about being considerate and can greatly impact yourself and others’ experiences. Here are 20 lesser-known fine dining rules to help you navigate upscale settings in style.
1. Keep the Edge of Your Plate Clean
As a courtesy to servers clearing your plates, keep the edges clean. This way, they can pick them up without getting their hands dirty.
2. Place Discards in the Upper Left Part of Your Plate
If your dish involves inedible items like lemon rind or bones, these should be placed on the upper left-hand side of the plate. They certainly shouldn’t be put in a napkin, on the tablecloth, or anywhere else.
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3. Never Say You’re Going to the Restroom
It’s never necessary to announce you’re going to the restroom. Simply excusing yourself from the table politely will suffice.
4. Leave One Bite
If you’re a dinner guest at a friend’s place, it’s common practice to finish your plate so they know you were pleased with the meal. However, at a high-end restaurant, it’s considered good manners to leave one bite–it implies that you enjoyed your food but are satisfied.
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5. Leave the Menu on the Table
At a high-brow restaurant, you should always leave the menu, or some portion of it, on the table instead of picking it up. Perhaps this was created to keep the menus clean or maybe it was to keep people from swinging them around, but if you think it seems arbitrary, we agree.
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6. Sip From the Same Spot
Etiquette doesn’t just apply to eating, but drinking too. When you take a sip, you should always drink from the same spot on the glass to avoid creating a lip ring around the edge. Additionally, when you place your glass back onto the table, aim for the spot your picked it up from.
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7. Don’t Clink Glasses
It may seem natural to clink glasses in celebration of a fine occasion but don’t. That glassware on the table is likely hundreds of dollars so you’ll want to avoid damaging it.
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8. Dab, Don’t Wipe
A big part of the fine dining game is using your napkin appropriately. When you go to wipe your lips, dab lightly instead of wiping and keep it placed neatly folded in your lap so no one has to look at your dirty napkin.
9. Dress Appropriately
Before your outing, check the dress code by looking at photos online or simply asking. You don’t want to show up over, or worse, underdressed.
10. Set Up Payment In Advance
If you’re hosting, make sure to set up payment in advance. This avoids those cringy moments when the check comes and multiple people try to swoop in to pay.
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11. Use the Correct Cutlery
You may be overwhelmed by the amount of cutlery you see when you sit down at the table, and you’re not alone. When in doubt, choose the outermost utensil and work your way in.
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12. Leave the Glassware Where it is
When you first arrive at your table, you may notice multiple glasses on the table. Even if you know you aren’t going to use most of them, don’t move them or turn them upside down–just leave them there and trust your server to take them away.
13. Respect Your Server
It’s important to remember that servers at fine restaurants are professionals. They don’t need you to flag them down or shout at them, they will pick up on the subtlest of cues, and signaling at them can seem rude.
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14. Avoid Making Special Requests
The chef and kitchen staff at fine restaurants have slaved for weeks or even months to give you a carefully curated selection of perfected dishes. Don’t offend them by making a lot of special requests and changing their vision.
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15. Wait Until Everyone Has Been Served
One of the more obvious rules is to not start eating until everyone at the table has been served. This applies to every course and just prevents anyone from feeling left out or having to watch others eat.
16. Be Mindful of Your Eating Pace
Don’t hoover down your meal–try to keep the same pace as everyone at the table. Not only is it the sociable thing to do, but it helps your servers have clarity on when to prepare for the next course.
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17. Use Indoor Voices
Of course, you’re out at a nice restaurant to have a good time, but be mindful of your surroundings. Don’t include the whole restaurant in your conversation.
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18. Don’t Return Wine
When you order wine and the server pours a small amount to let you taste it, it isn’t for you to act like a wine snob and send it back just because it’s a bit more tannic than you expected. The purpose is to make sure the wine isn’t spoiled. Sending it back for any other reason is plain rude.
19. Don’t Place Your Belongings on the Table
For many people, especially if you go out with a million things in your pockets, it’s natural to place your wallet, keys, and phone on the table when you sit down. However, part of the experience of fine dining is the carefully arranged table setting, and placing your things there spoils the ambiance.
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20. Don’t Stack Your Plates
Although it’s often the courteous thing to do in a crowded pub, stacking your plates doesn’t fly in nice restaurants. The servers here have a specific method and prefer to pick your plates up one by one.
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